Jason Trost’s Blog

It was supposed to be a simple round trip flight from London to Gibraltar. Hunter and I booked a the flight about a week out, so we were stuck going with easyJet, aka sleasyJet. They try to con you into thinking they’re cheaper, but they charge you for checking bags and the website has an opt-out insurance scheme for £9.95 pp. No thanks.

Our flight was scheduled to depart at 7am from London Gatwick. We left at 4:15 to get to the airport on time. We arrive at the airport at 5:30 to find a massive queue…the kind where you think you found the end, but a lovely BAA employee tells you to keep going. Not only is this the man that gives you the bad news, but he has to wake up at 3am to do it. Goes without saying he’s not the most accommodating individual.

We got to the front after some confusion at 6:30, at which time our friendly junkyJet check-in lady told us boarding started in ummm 4 (!!!) minutes with no particular sense of concern. We sprinted through security, stuffing our extra belongings into laptop bags. We were unaware of crappyJet’s one bag per person rule. After 20 minutes on the security line, we sprinted a mile to gate 34A, to find the flight attendant closing the gate.

We had arrived at the airport a good hour and a half before takeoff, and because of the poorly managed queue, we had almost missed our flight

So, this got me thinking, maybe shittyJet’s poor management wasn’t just sloppy, it was intentional. They want you to miss your flight. It’s part of their business plan. Modern airlines have computer check-in; they’re cheap and ease staff burden. LousyJet had no such computers and a horrible queuing system. They charge you massive amounts to change flights should you not get there in time because of their shit queue. Any industrial engineering student could make a more efficient system overnight. Queueing Theory 101 innit. It could be made more efficient by doing three things.

1. Computer check-in
2. A proper queuing system
3. Priority check-in for flights that leave soon

But that wasn’t the worst of our problems with sleasyJet. Our return flight was diverted into Malaga because of weather. Instead of discovering this through the airport monitor system or a regularly updated website, we heard it through ridicuJet’s primitive PA system. So, we slowly shuffled into overpacked buses on our way to Malaga. No company representative to answer questions, just a massive blob following each other confusedly. Luckily, Hunter and I were the first off the buses so we were in group A boarding priority. Ace.